Tuesday, November 08, 2005
Murdered Pot Roast and other disasters
Sporcupine sends her recipe for Murdered Pot Roast
"Put a 3 pound roast, two pounds of potatoes in chunks, half a pound of coined carrots (thick), a quarter pound of sliced mushrooms, three cups water with three cubes beef boullion, two tablespoons minced garlic, and the spices of your choice in a crockpot on low, planning to cook for 12 hours. Actually cook for 18. The results look like an ashen mess, but taste great. You can serve the roast with a salad fork."
I claim the Assault and Battery Apple Sauce trophy. When I was a child bride living in Utah, a friend I acquired a bushel of apples. We decided to make applesauce and put it up in jars, anticipating enough for the long winter ahead. Who needs a recipe? We peeled all the apples, cut them up threw them into a big pot of boiling water (like potatoes)and boiled them vigorously for a half hour or so, then we dumped them into a colander to drain all the taste away. Then we mashed them up. Since there was no taste left, so we added a lot of sugar and cinnamon and stuff. We each had one jar of applesauce
Other criminal acts against innocent food will be welcomed.
"Put a 3 pound roast, two pounds of potatoes in chunks, half a pound of coined carrots (thick), a quarter pound of sliced mushrooms, three cups water with three cubes beef boullion, two tablespoons minced garlic, and the spices of your choice in a crockpot on low, planning to cook for 12 hours. Actually cook for 18. The results look like an ashen mess, but taste great. You can serve the roast with a salad fork."
I claim the Assault and Battery Apple Sauce trophy. When I was a child bride living in Utah, a friend I acquired a bushel of apples. We decided to make applesauce and put it up in jars, anticipating enough for the long winter ahead. Who needs a recipe? We peeled all the apples, cut them up threw them into a big pot of boiling water (like potatoes)and boiled them vigorously for a half hour or so, then we dumped them into a colander to drain all the taste away. Then we mashed them up. Since there was no taste left, so we added a lot of sugar and cinnamon and stuff. We each had one jar of applesauce
Other criminal acts against innocent food will be welcomed.
# posted by Charlotte @ 5:13 AM 
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i once made hershey's syrup instead fudge. i would share the recipe, but i'm not quite sure how i managed it.
# posted by 
: Tuesday, November 08, 2005
: Tuesday, November 08, 2005
I feel compelled to repeat that Murdered Pot Roast is delicious, substantive food. I'm dim, but the food's wonderful stuff!
who can make divinity that does not run like barely's hershey syrup fudge? not me! someone once told me the weather plays a part in getting divinity the right consistency...
# posted by : Tuesday, November 08, 2005
: Tuesday, November 08, 2005
Once I made a Petrified Fourth of July dessert. This dessert involved meticulously placing strawberries and blueberries in a spiral pattern on a flan. (I was looking at a magazine picture) I got through arranging the berries and thought that it needed a glaze before I piped on the whipped cream, so I boiled sugar and water vigorously. When I poured it over the cold berries it immediately got as hard as a lollipop. The thing could have been hung on the wall as a plaque.
I have made not one, not two, but four pumpkin pies without sugar, and two lemon meringue pies the same way. Mortifying business. Like the berries just mentioned, they LOOKED good enough to eat, so I tried.
Two salmon filets, in foil, in a 425 degree oven, for an hour and half. More like cremation than cooking....
I once killed a canteloup by dumping its wet, wilting body into a bowl of Aunt Jemima pancake batter. I then subjected the whole mixture to a hot frying pan in order to make a cantaloup pancake...
you can guess the outcome
you can guess the outcome
# posted by : Thursday, November 10, 2005
: Thursday, November 10, 2005
Welcome,Oreta --
That sounds truly horrible. Everybody else, Oreta's specialty is animals (not cooking them, but caring for them).
That sounds truly horrible. Everybody else, Oreta's specialty is animals (not cooking them, but caring for them).
The recipe sounds very good! Pot roast should be fork tender.
My worst disaster happened when I was just learning to cook. My grandmother told me how to make grape jam. We had a concord grape vine in the backyard.
She told me to squish all the insides out and save the peels. Then I had to boil the pulp, strain out the seeds and mix the peels back in. The next step was to mix in sugar, one cup for one cup of fruit. Then you boil gently until a sample comes out the right consistency. The first time it was great! My parents were very impressed.
The next year, I made even more. Unfortunately, I didn't take the jam off the heat while I tested. The test was fine. The jam that was still on the stove became so solidified when it cooled I had to through the jars away!
My worst disaster happened when I was just learning to cook. My grandmother told me how to make grape jam. We had a concord grape vine in the backyard.
She told me to squish all the insides out and save the peels. Then I had to boil the pulp, strain out the seeds and mix the peels back in. The next step was to mix in sugar, one cup for one cup of fruit. Then you boil gently until a sample comes out the right consistency. The first time it was great! My parents were very impressed.
The next year, I made even more. Unfortunately, I didn't take the jam off the heat while I tested. The test was fine. The jam that was still on the stove became so solidified when it cooled I had to through the jars away!
# posted by : Tuesday, November 22, 2005
: Tuesday, November 22, 2005
No, but I know an interesting bit of trivia about marshmallows. They are so called because they were originally made from marsh mallows. I guess it has a thick sap that resembles the egg whites used today.
The mallow family includes okra, cotton and hibiscus.
I know the above because of my strange curiosity so tell me: Why do you want to make homemade marshmallows?
The mallow family includes okra, cotton and hibiscus.
I know the above because of my strange curiosity so tell me: Why do you want to make homemade marshmallows?
# posted by : Thursday, November 24, 2005
: Thursday, November 24, 2005
i sent you martha stewart's own recipe for marshmallows. there was a vegan recipe as well (no gelatin), but i thought martha would be more appropriate for the holidays.
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# posted by : Monday, December 05, 2005
: Monday, December 05, 2005 << Home
